I don’t think I can ever find happy, if I lost my child.
I cannot think of anything worst, as a parent.
Happiness = PERCEPTION of Life events – (Your EXPECTATION of how Life should be)
Mo Gawdat lost his son, and never stopped grieving.
However, he has started a life mission – spreading happiness to one billion people.
In his book, Solve for Happy, he says that Happiness is a formula, one that is reproducible.
Happiness = difference between (PERCEPTION of Life Events) and (EXPECTATION of what should have happened).
It is true.
Rain would make a farmer happy.
Rain would bring misery to those at the park.
I have a friend who had 29 points of what his potential mate should tick off, and is constantly disappointed.
He once lamented that he feels doomed for a life of a single, and will die alone.
I gently point out to him that:
1. His expectations might be too high, and
2. If he does meet someone who ticks his 29 boxes, she probably has a similar number of boxes that he won’t tick off.
That opened his eyes.
I can get the concept around managing my own expectations to achieve happiness but I don’t think I have the emotional resillience to plan and set expectations of how my life might be without my children.
Mo Gawdat still grieves, and he still hurts for the loss of his Ali, but it sounds like he has found fulfilment and happiness in his mission.
If ever I find myself facing such a situation, I can only hope to find the strength from his experience.